My Birthday Gift to Myself
It will be my birthday tomorrow (September 18th) and I will be turning 35. As a result of this I am giving myself the best gift I could ever give; forgiveness.
I sometimes feel as though I don’t deserve happiness because of mistakes I have made in the past. I sometimes feel like I have to accomplish things in order to feel good about the fact that I am alive. I sometimes feel that I owe the world so much because I lived through my surgeries. I sometimes feel that I have to help others around me in order to feel that I am not wasting time. It is time that I let these emotions go and realize that I myself am more than enough.
I am forgiving myself for all that I have held onto over the years. I am getting rid of any hostility I had towards anyone who wronged me. I am forgiving myself for any wrong I have inflicted on people. Why do I feel I deserve to do that? Because when you know better, you do better. I am Letting go of hurt and anger I had towards myself for the circumstances I was born into. I am allowing myself to exchange sadness and depression for happiness, why? I deserve to be happy.
I welcome this new chapter in my life with open arms and an open heart (just hopefully not another open-heart surgery… thanks).
I have held onto hurtful sad filled moments for far too long that have made far too large an impact on my life and it is time they no longer have a say in my future. This is the gift I am giving to myself and I am allowing myself to receive this gift.